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neuroticmind

Lawak!!!

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Sayang

Di suatu malam yang dingin, di dalam sebuah bilik yang sederhana besar, di atas katil...... sepasang suami isteri yang telah lanjut usia baru masuk tidur. Suaminya telah mula mengantuk tapi isterinya terbangkit perasaan ghairah malam itu....

Si isteri bersuara, "Dulu-dulu tu.... abang selalu pegang tangan saya bila kita nak tido." Suaminya dengan separuh sedar, menggenggam tangan isterinya, pas tu mula mengantuk semula.

Beberapa ketika pas tu, si isteri bersuara lagi, "Kemudian tu....abang selalu cium saya." Si suami dengan rasa terganggu, mengangkat kepalanya dan menyentuh bibirnya ke pipi si isteri. Pas tu sambung tido balik.

Selepas beberapa saat, si isteri bersuara lagi, "Kemudian tu.... abang selalu gigit-gigit leher saya......." Dengan perasaan marah dan geram, si suami melontar selimutnya dan bangun dari katil tu.

Si isteri bertanya, "Abang nak gi maner tu?" Dengan marah suaminya menjawab, "Nak gi amik gigi ..."

HAHAHAHHA......................!!!

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LoL! isteri dah tua, tapi gatal.

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Hahahaha eheh ehem ermm well I wish could understand that joke :whistling:

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neuroticmind~ehere u got this lawak .. hahahahhahaha .. lawak sungguh .. :lol::lol1:

audio~that's y u should learn malay .. :wink3:

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Johnny wanted to have sex with a girl in his office.....but she belonged to

someone else. One day Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and

said I'll give you a $100 if you let me have sex with you....but the girl

said NO.

Johnny said I'll be fast, I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down,

and I?ll be finished by the time you pick it up.

She thought for a moment and said that she would have to consult her

boyfriend.....so she called her boyfriend and told him the story. Her

boyfriend says ask him for $200, pick up the money very fast, he won't even

be able to get his pants down. So she agrees and accepts the proposal. Half

an hour goes by and the boyfriend is waiting for his girlfriend to call.

Finally after 45 minutes the boyfriend calls and asks what

happened......She said "The bastard used coins!!"

Management lesson:

Always consider a business proposal in it's entirety before agreeing to it

and getting screwed!

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My Birthday

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very

well waking up that morning.

I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife

would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!",

and possibly have a present for me.

As it turned out, she barely said good morning,

let alone "Happy Birthday."

I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the

kids will remember.

My kids came in to breakfast and didn't say a

word.

So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and

somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane

said, "Good Morning Boss, Happy Birthday!" It

felt a little better that at least someone had

remembered.

I worked until one o'clock and then Jane knocked

on my door and said, "You know, it's such

a

beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's

go out to lunch, just you and me."

I said, "Thanks Jane, that's the greatest thing I've

heard all day. Let's go!"

We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we

normally would go. We dined instead at a little

place with a private table. We had two martinis

each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On

the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know,

it's such a beautiful day...We don't need to go

back to the office, do we?"

I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in

mind?"

She said, "Let's go to my apartment.">

After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to

me and said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going

to step into the bedroom for a moment. I'll be

right back."

"Ok." I nervously replied

She went into the bedroom and, after a couple

of

minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday

cake. Followed by my wife, kids, and dozens of

my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy

Birthday".

And I just sat there.............

On the couch.................

Naked...............

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Hahahahaaaa!!! tickling me ta death! hehe... I like the 1st most hehe...

Anyway,.. nice joke dude!...

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Sayang

Di suatu malam yang dingin, di dalam sebuah bilik yang sederhana besar, di atas katil...... sepasang suami isteri yang telah lanjut usia baru masuk tidur. Suaminya telah mula mengantuk tapi isterinya terbangkit perasaan ghairah malam itu....

Si isteri bersuara, "Dulu-dulu tu.... abang selalu pegang tangan saya bila kita nak tido." Suaminya dengan separuh sedar, menggenggam tangan isterinya, pas tu mula mengantuk semula.

Beberapa ketika pas tu, si isteri bersuara lagi, "Kemudian tu....abang selalu cium saya." Si suami dengan rasa terganggu, mengangkat kepalanya dan menyentuh bibirnya ke pipi si isteri. Pas tu sambung tido balik.

Selepas beberapa saat, si isteri bersuara lagi, "Kemudian tu.... abang selalu gigit-gigit leher saya......." Dengan perasaan marah dan geram, si suami melontar selimutnya dan bangun dari katil tu.

Si isteri bertanya, "Abang nak gi maner tu?" Dengan marah suaminya menjawab, "Nak gi amik gigi ..."

HAHAHAHHA......................!!!

Love,

On a cold night, in an average size room, on the bed..... a pair of aged husband and wife was going to sleep. The husband was falling asleep but the wife was horny that night.

The wife said " Last time, you used to hold my hands when we were going to sleep." the husband, who is half awake graps her hands and then fall back asleep

after a while, the wife said again," And then, you used to kiss me." he feeling disturbed, held his head and kiss her cheeks. he continue back to sleep.

a few seconds later, she said "then ... u used to bite my neck"...

Feeling angry and frustrated, he threw his blanket and rise from the bed.

she ask " where are you going?"

he angrily replied " I"M GOING TO GET MY TEETH!"

hope it helps you to understnad the joke. :P

pardon the grammar error ... ^_^

damm funny ler. miang miang keladi :lol1:

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Confusion in the Bathroom...

A man is sitting down on a public toilet when suddenly, the guy in the stall next to him says:

Hi, how are you??

Um...fine,? answers the man.

What are you up to?? asks the other guy.

I'm traveling,? the man says hesitantly.

"Are you coming over soon?"

"Excuse me?"

Mind if I stop over??

What? ARE YOU CRAZY? Don't even think of coming over here!"

Hey, I'll call you back,? says the other guy. ?The idiot in the next stall keeps talking to me.?

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One fine afternoon, after some hardwork , Chee the manager decided to buy KFC as the reward for his staff, and when he brought back and his staff start eating, someone came in and asked" wah, got KFC to eat, who buy?" The staff answered "Chee Buy Lah"......

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