chica 0 Report post Posted November 29, 2005 dunno got similar thread or not.I get so tired with my bf sometimes I wonder what if I can 'freeze' him (well I wanna marry him but not just yet) and go off and some adventures. Miss the dates and ppl trying to get your attention, know what I mean? Is this normal? I only know him for 3 years but living together for 2 years now. Do you guys think this is something to worry about? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
michellechen 0 Report post Posted November 29, 2005 I think u r juz kinda "bored" with him... No mor sparks like u guys 1st dated... Living 2gether tends 2 make evythin goes like routines, very easy 2 get bored... Mayb go 4 a vacation or do smt 2 spice up ur relationship... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Serra 0 Report post Posted November 29, 2005 LOL. Something similar happened to me, though I wouldnt say I got tired of him. It was more like, I got tired of our relationship cos it is soooo routined (like michellechen said) and I wished there were more "adventures" to it. Maybe it is becos ive watched too many dramas. hehe. THere was one period where I did imagined that I was single once again and i sorta flirted abit with other guys, but we were on safe grounds as I just fooling, and they know I am just playing as well. At one point, things got out of hand when i started to have doubts about my own feelings. I thought I was having a crush on someone else. And I started to think about the outcome, that I might lose my bf if something did happen between me and that someone else. And I freaked. Hehe. I didnt wanna lose my bf. So, i took time off and got my feelings sorted out. Turn out i dun have a crush on that someone after all, and it was all just a friction of my imagination. It's a good thing I did not do anything stupid, otherwise things may not turn out well. Anyways, thats my story la. Hehe. as for ur case, i dun think it is abnormal to miss the dating days where we use to get the attention bla bla bla. And yea, freezing our bf would be tempting wouldnt it? Hehe, but not possible. Maybe you should just tell ur bfs how much u miss those days (I did, and lately he's been bringing me out for expensive dinners, hehe), and work things out. Gotta agree with michelle. try to do things to spark up the rship a lil. Ask your bf to surprise you once in a while. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
epileatheral 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 That is the problem with guys! Many guys, when going after the girl, they'll do many things they like and etc. But once they are together, that's it! They think the relationship is already secured. Then up to a certain point, the girl swayed and left him for another guy.. and people blame the girl. But the fact is, it is not all the girl's fault. However, girls should also understand, guys when they are interested in you, and haven't get you, they'll tend to be so nice towards you. That's why, normally, the guy who's going after you, is Always better than your BF. Guys, should constantly think of ways to renew the relationship. It's an expected fact that guys should take the active role in the relationship. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chocoblast 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 ...well at least you didnt say bring to pet store and exchange him for a puppy.... lol Would it be nice to exchange him for someone else... ? I wont say change for someone better.. just different.. spice things up. ...compared to having him in freezer! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shazzac 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 Choco, ur reply is really entertaining lol.it's normal to feel this way. Do something together or on your own. Go camping, mountain climbing or just plain cooking together, it's fun... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
astrosurge 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 i think guys shud do more after courtships..both can be creative in performing activities they like or have similar interests. it can be hobbies, or new stuff they can venture into together instead of sticking to the mundane routine everyday. thats why ppl say, to get a partner, she/he must have at least 1 similar interest with you otherwise the relationship can easily turn cold when boredom comes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chocoblast 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 Choco, ur reply is really entertaining lol.it's normal to feel this way. Do something together or on your own. Go camping, mountain climbing or just plain cooking together, it's fun... Thanx Shazzac. Something to kick-start the fun...Ingredients1. Chocolates - 500gm2. Flour - 20gm3. Eggs - 24. Butter - 10gm5. Banana - 'secukup rasa' / as many as you like6. Whipped cream7. Ice-cream (to top off at the end) 8. Strawberry / Cherry Cooking method is up to your imagination... ... but decide what are you hungry, for in the first place Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shazzac 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 Choco, Are u a pastry chef? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chocoblast 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 Shazzac, ... by profession, no. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chica 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 LOL. Something similar happened to me, though I wouldnt say I got tired of him. It was more like, I got tired of our relationship cos it is soooo routined (like michellechen said) and I wished there were more "adventures" to it. Maybe it is becos ive watched too many dramas. hehe. THere was one period where I did imagined that I was single once again and i sorta flirted abit with other guys, but we were on safe grounds as I just fooling, and they know I am just playing as well. At one point, things got out of hand when i started to have doubts about my own feelings. I thought I was having a crush on someone else. And I started to think about the outcome, that I might lose my bf if something did happen between me and that someone else. And I freaked. Hehe. I didnt wanna lose my bf. So, i took time off and got my feelings sorted out. Turn out i dun have a crush on that someone after all, and it was all just a friction of my imagination. It's a good thing I did not do anything stupid, otherwise things may not turn out well. Anyways, thats my story la. Hehe. as for ur case, i dun think it is abnormal to miss the dating days where we use to get the attention bla bla bla. And yea, freezing our bf would be tempting wouldnt it? Hehe, but not possible. Maybe you should just tell ur bfs how much u miss those days (I did, and lately he's been bringing me out for expensive dinners, hehe), and work things out. Gotta agree with michelle. try to do things to spark up the rship a lil. Ask your bf to surprise you once in a while. what if i tell u that i'm not freaked out imagining myself with someone else. it's the feeling of 'lazy to go thru such hassle' cos v r so established with family knowledge and all............... kinda pathetic if u ask me.IT'S ONLY 3 YEARS... how I dare to think bout the future le... sigh! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chica 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 That is the problem with guys! Many guys, when going after the girl, they'll do many things they like and etc. But once they are together, that's it! They think the relationship is already secured. Then up to a certain point, the girl swayed and left him for another guy.. and people blame the girl. But the fact is, it is not all the girl's fault. However, girls should also understand, guys when they are interested in you, and haven't get you, they'll tend to be so nice towards you. That's why, normally, the guy who's going after you, is Always better than your BF. Guys, should constantly think of ways to renew the relationship. It's an expected fact that guys should take the active role in the relationship. i can think of many things to do to spice things up - surprises, sexy lingerie, vacation like michelle said, nice dinners. but I dun wanna be the one initiating those. that's a man's job. with discussion (not serious discussion, just some noise i made) he took it like a joke... like I merajuk only or smt. yeah, right now other ppl is better than my bf. right guy at the wrong time....???? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
michellechen 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 That is the problem with guys! Many guys, when going after the girl, they'll do many things they like and etc. But once they are together, that's it! Hmm.., u mean, like in a race, u 1 2 win so badly, so u put so much efforts, run n run n run... Finally u win, got d medal/trophy... Then wht? U juz chuck it aside on d rack, lettin it eat dust... Wht's d hassle? D medal is already urs... Tht's guys? Juz kiddin... Actually, I agree. Guys wen courtin time of course wil b their best. But tht doesn't mean tht they r better than ur bf... Relationship has dif levels n needs dif approach 2 handle... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chica 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 that sounds logical - guys are at their best when courting.so there, is there a way to 'untrophy' yourself? my guy fren advise me to lock the bathroom door. more privacy = more temptation? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
michellechen 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 (edited) but I dun wanna be the one initiating those. that's a man's job. with discussion (not serious discussion, just some noise i made) he took it like a joke... like I merajuk only or smt. Tell him seriously... N ask him 2 take u seriously...Actually, relationship is a 2-way thing... I dun c any prob if d girl initiatin, after all, u c d prob, he might not c it... 2 sum guys, things tht aren't broken dun need repairin... They actually dun c this as a prob... So if u wait 4 him 2 initiate, chances r, he won't... Edited November 30, 2005 by michellechen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chica 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 like tat hav to pick a date lor. wait till he not preoccupied with his work. gotta make a big deal out of it so he will really pay attention and listen! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shazzac 0 Report post Posted November 30, 2005 But then again not all guys are boring when they've been with the girl for some time. Maybe he's just not the romantic type? or maybe he's just taking u for granted now? Hrm, like they always say, guys aren't mind readers. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chica 0 Report post Posted December 1, 2005 yeah, he's not the romantic type. in fact, non of the guys i've been with is the romantic type. so maybe it's my problem, maybe i secretly hate romantic guys sigh sigh...!there's one thing that i think will get him to be more caring... me pretending to be weak and helpless. sometimes a girl being tough is well, tough....... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
epileatheral 0 Report post Posted December 2, 2005 Hmm.., u mean, like in a race, u 1 2 win so badly, so u put so much efforts, run n run n run... Finally u win, got d medal/trophy... Then wht? U juz chuck it aside on d rack, lettin it eat dust... Wht's d hassle? D medal is already urs... That's a good analogy. Yeah.. it seems that lots of guys are like that. I felt that there were few instances, I was like that too. Chica, I agree that u need to talk seriously about it.All right, just to share what I've did before. There's once, a saturday morning, I go pick up my gf. Then I start driving, she kept asking me where am I going, but I didn't tell her. So, I drove all the way to Mersing, and stop by a departmental store. Coz' we didn't pack anythings, so, I told her to get some clothes, towel, toothbrush, and anything we needed. After that, went to a tour agent ask ask them to help us find a room in Tioman, and there we went to Tioman.The fun thing is not packing clothes for vacation, and you're forced to buy it. Really kinda fun. Of course, need to have some extra cash. Just got my bonus that time. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chica 0 Report post Posted December 2, 2005 hmmm? tot u gonna tell us bout your experience in serious talk. turns out it's something impulsive u did together. hehe my bf is not the impulsiv type le and frankly we got too domesticated too fast. at first, it was kinda meaningful. now, it's just so routined. well, he's the hubby material but seems like emotional needs r not being met right now. of course i can shrug it off and life goes on. but then again when i c auntie uncles jalan one walk in front, one walk behind holding kids - darn, i dun wanna end up like them! **shudders** Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
epileatheral 0 Report post Posted December 2, 2005 Haha.. I have no experiences in such talk.. coz' I dun have such problems.. hahaha Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chica 0 Report post Posted December 2, 2005 good for u la. but i also dunno how to get into the serious mood talk thing. later he think i'm giving him pressure pulak. haihhh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites