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Eve415

Maybe you babes can give me advice...

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I met a guy from MSN about 10 months ago. At that time, I was just rejected by another guy and this guy helped me to get through the hard time very fast.
He gave me his phone number and we started chatting through sms. We enjoyed sms chatting and we sent up to 500 sms to each other just in one month...
A month later, we decided to meet up. Everything was going well... it's good to know a new friend anyway ...
However, there was an abnormalilty between both of us... sometimes he liked to make me aroused through sms... and we had phone sex for a few times...
we still continue dating as usual even though we have this abnormal relationship...
Don't know since when I start to have crush on him and hope to have progress in this relationship...
We stopped that abnormal phone sex as he knew I am not open to it with current relationship status...
I would like to continue with current state with him and hope he will develop relationship with me one day...
But some of my friend said I am just wasting time...
I would like to get more opinions...
just hope that you can help...

Thnx

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my dear girl,

You did not give us enough information to give any help exactly... and even if you do we can only give speculation...

So why don't you just ask him upfront whether both of you can advance or stay friends... Its really no use for us to speculate for you...

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[quote name='greekgod' timestamp='1306898388' post='596296']
my dear girl,

You did not give us enough information to give any help exactly... and even if you do we can only give speculation...

So why don't you just ask him upfront whether both of you can advance or stay friends... Its really no use for us to speculate for you...
[/quote]


Thank you for your reply.
I did once but not very straight forward. I asked him if i treated him too well as a friend and I said this is not the normal way i treat a friend. Then he said he likes to be my friend and asked me to treat him like a friend. But then, we are still dating as normal....
Not sure what will happen if I ask again....
He always said "shun qi zi ran"...

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Hi, So if I understand this, he wants to have phone sex occassionally but also likes dating you and seeing you in person. Does he like to have "make out" physically or just on the phone? I'm a little confused. If he wanted phone sex in addition to making out and hanging out with you, then he's a perfectly normal male. If he can only have phone sex and doesn't want to actually have any physical contact, then, I think you either need to ask him if he wants to have a physical relationship (if you do) or tell him you want to develop a physical relationship in the future but the phone sex isn't working for you right now and you want to be friends, date and see how a relationship, without the phone sex develops. Basically, you just need to let him know that the phone sex is not doing a thing for you. Maybe he is shy and wants to make out with you but feels more confident on the phone. Good Luck!

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Thank you for your reply too.
But I don't think I will take the move to tell him how I feel...
He told me last month that he will be busy until June...but since early May, he is busy until not replying any of my messages, even if he did, the content will be" can't make it...", "working..", "not free..."
When i gave him the cake or pudding that i made, we were like seller and buyer... after i gave him the thing, he can't wait to go back to his house, not even have a little chat coz he said he was busy with work...
So, i felt that he is avoiding me....the way he treats me now, hurts me very much...

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I am really sorry to tell you this, but I think he is avoiding you, you yourself feel it too. I think you should let it go.

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[quote name='ks_star' timestamp='1307868235' post='596643']
I am really sorry to tell you this, but I think he is avoiding you, you yourself feel it too. I think you should let it go.
[/quote]

I did let go... by telling him my feelings... that i felt that i was being avoided... and told him that I won't contact him at least for some time...
But it didn't last long, I sent him sms after a few days... and unexpectedly he replied me... The percentage of him replied me was higher ever since... (don't know what was he thinking though)

I had dinner with him yesterday (after not meeting up for about 2 months). I think i managed myself quite well and through conversation i knew that he was very busy with his work for past few months...
I kept reminding myself not to think too much and just let it be...
At least, I know I was not being avoided~~

Anyway, thanks for your advice :)

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hey looks like you 2 are very successful but also really busy.... I'd say take it slow because having a face to face conversation is sometimes harder than it seems. Anyone can share easily via sms and it takes only a few seconds to knock a one line sms off.

But face to face - hey there's so much more information to process... what's she thinking? that eyebrow movement? what does that mean? Am i sending the right signals? Does he like what I'm wearing? In 2 seconds, your brains overloaded with information. & its stressful, you cant delete what you've just said to his face like an sms.....

Ok, sounds like you're ready to take the friendship to the next level, I think he's ready too but approaching it conservatively & taking a better be safe than sorry attitude. That's the adventure of being alife! Enjoy his company and relax, he'll come around. Be yourself. Have fun!

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Is normal, i do have crash in sugarbook.live we have been dated out for few times before becoming couple. First you need to have courage to date people out for the relationship to continue

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