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epileatheral

Intimate Companionship?

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Was watching a singapore program yesterday, and it was talking about the rise of people engaging in what they call Intimate friendship..

It's getting popular in Singapore, where a male and a female, not in love, but for the sake of companionship and.. uh.. sexual satisfaction, got together, just for fun. It's a non-commited relationship. There's no love involved.. It's a friendship that shares every single thing, secrets, desires, fun... and everything.

Surprisingly, a survey shows that more girls is able to accept such thing than guys, as long as the relationship is kept discreet. The reason of such relationship, claimed by several interviewee.. is the relationship is more carefree, and pressureless...

what's your view?

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Hm.. maybe they dont wanna have any responsibilities??

then this relationship would be a bit meaningless though.. rolleyes.gif

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Hm.. maybe they dont wanna have any responsibilities??

then this relationship would be a bit meaningless though.. rolleyes.gif

yea...agree with you..

afraid of commitment. it's gona be very complicated. what if one partner suddenly falls in love with the partner but the partner doesnt? or what if the partner found another girl/guy..then that guy found out their secret relationship?

it's gonna be tough la.

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sweatdrop.gif i think that its a very silly thing... and its also kinda "cheap".... the one who rugi most will be the girl.... dun u think so?

but hor.... in another perspective, some ppl just haf a higher sex drive ... and they wanna fulfil it without anything tying them down... no commitment....

personally, i dun agree with this thing... but then again, it just depends on each individual ....

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what's your view?

can have love involved. no sexual intercourse required. its good for everyone must have a friend like this.

intimate - being close to someone.

passionate - lust for one another.

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the one who rugi most

in life, everyone will rugi and untung here and there. no need to calculate to the extend where everything you do in life must be untung and people must show their gratitude towards us with rewards. this is what it means to let go in order to be free and happy.

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can have love involved. no sexual intercourse required. its good for everyone must have a friend like this.

intimate - being close to someone.

passionate - lust for one another.

i tot the thread is about no love involved, sexual intercourse REQUIRED... confused1.gif or is it i read wrongly?

It's getting popular in Singapore, where a male and a female, not in love, but for the sake of companionship and.. uh.. sexual satisfaction, got together, just for fun. It's a non-commited relationship. There's no love involved.. It's a friendship that shares every single thing, secrets, desires, fun... and everything.

or u read wrongly? tongue.gif

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Hm.. maybe they dont wanna have any responsibilities??

then this relationship would be a bit meaningless though.. rolleyes.gif

i'm certain there are responsibilities. even people who are out to have fun like going to the movies will have responsibilities to a certain extent; like showing up with the tickets.

just that the responsilities do not include those who have sexual intercourse like using a condom for safe sex and checking for pregnancy. this is probably the kind of relationship those 'power women' want where they do not have to 'breed' yet have all the intimacy they want from men.

even the members who are close (intimate) here have responsibilities towards each other. i would even put forward that some love one another. btw, all LDRs work this way.

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i tot the thread is about no love involved, sexual intercourse REQUIRED... confused1.gif or is it i read wrongly?

you didn't read wrongly. it is about sex without love (in singapore). i'm saying we can have love without sex. this is the alternative which i think is good. if you think about it, this is how you can have lots of 'real' and reliable friends.

the author used the word intimate in the wrong context. sex without love is lust and has nothing to do with intimacy. intimacy is what close friends have and what children who are close to their parents share. intimate bonds and sexual bonds are different because one needs to like another person to create intimacy whereas sexual bonds do not require any fondness or love between the couple. this is why a man can rape a woman - he is able to have sexual intercourse despite there being no love or affections.

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Pardon me on the misuse of the word intimate. I used that to replace sexual.. since I'm new here and felt the word is rather offensive.

Cossie on "in life, everyone will rugi and untung here and there. no need to calculate ". I felt its very true. But.. we still is bound to general perception of sex. To general, sex is something that "merugikan" the girl, and the guy gets lucky. Why can't people think of sex as mutual satisfaction? Sex, if not forced, is supposed to be enjoyed by both.. but no matter what, we still think that it's bad for the girl.

On the other hand, such relationship, I think.. would be dangerous if one is to fall for another but the other doesn't. One of the interviewee said,

She had this relationship with this guy. They have mutual agreement that, if she falls for some other guy, and wanted to go steady with that guy, he would back out and wouldn't interfere with it, and vice versa.

She said that, she enjoys the relationship, coz' whenever she broke up with a bf, she won't feel so lost, as she still have this guy. It works like a mutual spare tyres.

They have nothing to hide, nothing to be shy about...

But I think, it's still dangerous for the gal. Coz' what if the guy betray her and tell around everyone that he's havng sex with her just for fun?

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ooh..I remembered they did a horrorscope study too.. that Leo, Scorpio and Librans are more likely to accept such relationship.

Virgroans and Cancerians are the least able to.

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ooh..I remembered they did a horrorscope study too.. that Leo, Scorpio and Librans are more likely to accept such relationship.

shocking.gif gasp!! really? i'm leo.... i dun condone such acts tongue.gif disgraceful...

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Cossie on "in life, everyone will rugi and untung here and there. no need to calculate ". I felt its very true. But.. we still is bound to general perception of sex. To general, sex is something that "merugikan" the girl, and the guy gets lucky. Why can't people think of sex as mutual satisfaction?  Sex, if not forced, is supposed to be enjoyed by both.. but no matter what, we still think that it's bad for the girl.

umm... i haven't seen any case yet where a girl have sex with a guy and didn't end up married untung lor. maybe the best case for a girl to have sex, get married with a guy and untung is Anna Nicole Smith. otherwise she rugi no matter if she is a taiwanese politician or a porn star from singapore.

in order to speak for most women, one has to be general. women who sleep around sure rugi wan. imagine our mothers doing so. even the children will feel ashame. don't look too far when we think about what is right or wrong in life. look in our own families first.

what someone does to others, yet others can do unto them.

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Yeah... it's always the women who is rugi... because of general perception. Sometimes I felt it's very unfair for women. I wonder since when people have this kind of perception.

Guy who sleeps around = Playboy

Girl who sleeps around = Bitch, slut...

don't u think.. in terms of the terms used.. it's already pretty unfair?

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But anyway... the type of relationship discussed in the forum I watch is.. totally discreet relationship. Those interviewees are anonymous, and face darkened.

No one know that she's sleeping around. And she's not sleeping around with guys. It's just one guy.

After breaking up, she felt the need for sex, but didn't want to have a commited relationship... so, she started this type of relationship with the guy. She doesn't go around pubs and sleep with different different guys.. or ONS>

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Yeah... it's always the women who is rugi... because of general perception. Sometimes I felt it's very unfair for women. I wonder since when people have this kind of perception.

Guy who sleeps around = Playboy

Girl who sleeps around = Bitch, slut...

don't u think.. in terms of the terms used.. it's already pretty unfair?

depends lor... you see... it may be the girls that have themselves to blame: so many of them like bad boys; hence some guys get to be playboys. why do women go for them even though they know that? is it the guy's fault? nope. why did nicole kidman snatch tom cruise from his wife? then another woman stepped in and what happened? what about hugh grant and david beckham?

so who calls the women slut and bitch? do men care to call these women those names? even if paris hilton has been called a tart, would it stop a lot of guys from having sex with her? i think it is the women who is offended by her 'conquest'.

fair or unfair, it seems it is more up to the women to settle this.

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its general perception that tells so, and we been though by our parents and grandparents that girl will always rugi if they go and sleep around with numbers of ppl..but its different now. think about it, if guys can think abou sex, why cant girls? if a girl feel like having a companion, and she still not so into a steady relationship, this, i guess is the best way for her. i wont say that the girl is cheap or call her names like slut or a bitch.

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Erm.. well.. for me.. I'm not sure if would have such relationship. But, even if I had one.. I wouldn't let people know. I'll keep it discreet.

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sure you wouldnt wan ppl to know, cos still, malaysian community wont accept this kind of things. as for me, i wont have this kind of relationship, cos i'm scare that i will get emotionaly involve with the girl or vice versa, since that i dun wan to hurt anyone...

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Sad to say dat its true... all these have been around for years but thank goodness it's not so widespread in M'sia. Not to discriminate S'pore, but SOME of the gurls there r very materialistic.. but their beautiful. Its not a crime but it makes them take the shortcut to earning material items when engaging in intimate frendship.

Well... to be honest i know frends who does it too in Msia. They know they rugi in a certain way but it doesnt matter coz they gain in other ways. Lets put it dat they enjoy the attention but dislike the commitment. I guess the would change perceptions once they meet the ideal partner... hopefuly!

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that's an absolute truth. If u drive an expensive car in Singapore, no matter how u look, u'll definately get a gf.. That's what many says.

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umm... i haven't seen any case yet where a girl have sex with a guy and didn't end up married untung lor. maybe the best case for a girl to have sex, get married with a guy and untung is Anna Nicole Smith. otherwise she rugi no matter if she is a taiwanese politician or a porn star from singapore.

in order to speak for most women, one has to be general. women who sleep around sure rugi wan. imagine our mothers doing so. even the children will feel ashame. don't look too far when we think about what is right or wrong in life. look in our own families first.

what someone does to others, yet others can do unto them.

actually it's mutually agreed and mutually rewarding, when perceived with the right mindset. if the woman can accept sleeping around without commitment, she also dun bother rugi or not lar. the only tangible thing she could risk rugiing is getting pregnant.

u mean the children will be ashamed if their mother sleep around, but not the father?

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u mean the children will be ashamed if their mother sleep around, but not the father?

of course that is not what i meant. i was not talking to a person who is a husband and father. can't you read?

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that's an absolute truth. If u drive an expensive car in Singapore, no matter how u look, u'll definately get a gf.. That's what many says.

i dun like guys who 'chung' one. no money is not a sin. i got frens last time their bf before going out with them borrow nice sport car fetch them. it is so wrong.

also got one fren practising intimate companionship. she is a loner in a way, i think it is her way of justifying her loneliness...

u guys sure thinking wanna get nice car to get girls to have intimate companionship leh?

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of course that is not what i meant. i was not talking to a person who is a husband and father. can't you read?

u bet i can. if so, your example is not an appropriate one.

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