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sandra.siaoli

Quarrel with BF mother

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i had quarrel with my bf mother this afternoon, i don't know what to do...

i have said sorry when she yelling at me but then she doesn't accept my apologies.

can anyone tell me what to do??

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u live together with his mother? if not dont bother for a while , after some time she will be fine.

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How come ended up a quarrel?

No matter what she did, still she is an elder.

You won't want to put your bf in tough situation again.

Take it easy for a while as you don't approach to her for at least certain a period.

Let her cool off as you bf need to do some work for you on his mum.

Let her impression on you gets back up.

Yes, think before you speak.

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The worse thing you can do is actually get into an argument with his mother. No matter what he will be on his mom’s side coz she is after all, his mom. Quickly apologize and then tell your bf both sides of the story and ask him to help talk to his mom if she doesn’t want to talk to u. maybe you can send some flowers over too and a sorry card, never know, might cool her down! Good luck!

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agree with everything said. Fighting in a family is not every going to solve anything because you'll still end up with the problem and then you have to repair the damage done. Problem with older wives is that they also have more time on their hands which they use to run the days memorable instances over and over again in their heads, so that everytime a negative incident goes thru their head it seems worst that it actually is. They also use the time to dwell and fume over it, which can go on and last for weeks.

Yeah please think before you speak, you can do so much good by choosing your words well, but also alot of damage if you're not careful. Keep a cool head and just get down and work on repairing the relationship with mom. When she comes around she'll appreciate the effort you take to say sorry and be friends again with her. Good luck.

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it's true to use words wisely and think it through b4 u talk to elders.

I had experienced this b4, it was some slight misunderstood but then i apologies and let things cool off for some time. bout a month lidet. Well, i'm in good terms with his mom again. Btw, i don't know what happened, but u need to know tht individuals are brought up differently with different family values and believes, some doings that are okay with our parents are not necssary ok with other's parents.

Hope you'll get back in good terms with his mom =) good luck

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wow... how serious is it?

if it's just a small matter, ask ur bf what does his mom like (eg fav food, fav perfume, drama series) then die die also go buy for her (e.g. drive to ipoh just to ta pau food back, buy the whole series set for her)

but that's only for small matters, if u practise it for big matters, i worry she might retort with, "you throw money then u think everything will be ok ah" u__u"

GOOD LUCK BABE!

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Give her some time to cool down. No mother can ever accept her son's gf behaving rude / talk back what's more quarrel..I guess you would have to be very patient, to regain her trust and confidence in you again...I'm sure if you're sincere and genuine with your apology, she will understand and forgive you.

Start talking to her, buying her gifts and when you have the chance in the future, apologize for what happened. If this wasnt your cause of the quarrel, you should still apologize for the tone you used coz no matter what happen, she is an elderly. ...all the best babe!!

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heh??

here is my advice... move out with your bf and stay somewhere... yea... no more mummy talk...

if not...

i will pass you a sharp knife... butcher her... and bury her in the back yard... yay... no more mummy... :D

i willing to help for a fee.... RM 500 is my price... OHOHOHOHOHOHO

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what triggered the quarrel? Well, you need to see who's at fault.. But you wont be expecting an apology for an elder for forget abt it if she's da wrong one.. Anyway, just let things cool down..

Btw, the mom's mind: walao, this girl hasnt married to my son yet dare to quarrel with me.. what kind of daughter in law will she be..

But, again i'm not trying to scare you.. it's juz tat sometimes i feel elders feel that they are older so they can lecture you on whatever that they tink it's right but mayb wrong.. if you dun agree to her, juz ignore her.. dun get urself into tis kind of situation where it's difficult for both u n ur bf..

GOOD LUCK babe..

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the case was i'm not actually direct fight with her...

i said something wrong in msn to her another son, then she called to me when i was busy working with my stuff, then scold me; so i ran into a room and said sorry & sorry to her... she was so angry and did not accept my apologies..

whatever... v not married yet.... still have time for me to think over and over again if i can still be together with him and his family

before married is still the matter for 2 person, after married, it's a matter for 2 families... have to think v serious on this!!

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why does the 'mum' always has to get involved? i think it's typical that girls would somehow have problems with their bf/hubby's mum..

i too had the same problem.. i didn't even argued with her.. just that she hated me.. how i wish i could yell & slap her and all.. hmmm... maybe i can now since my ex-bf left me coz she told him to either choose me or her..

btw, don't ever ever date a mummy's boy *sigh*

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agree agree!! it is hard to be with someone who listens to their mum "all the time". his mum will be checking on this and that, say this say that and worst still, you don't even have your own sweet time with your bf ... but whatever it is, if the guy loves u, he will think of a way to solve things in between u and his mum.

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the case was i'm not actually direct fight with her...

i said something wrong in msn to her another son, then she called to me when i was busy working with my stuff, then scold me; so i ran into a room and said sorry & sorry to her... she was so angry and did not accept my apologies..

You mean her other son complained to her mom about what you wrote in MSN? Without your going into details, perhaps the mom was peeved with something insensitive you said. What exactly did you say anyway?

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her son, means my bf's brother complaint to his mom abt what i wrote in MSN, and made that into a big issue....

i duno what and how he complaining.. but then, he really made thing become serious.

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her son, means my bf's brother complaint to his mom abt what i wrote in MSN, and made that into a big issue....

i duno what and how he complaining.. but then, he really made thing become serious.

If you did not know what the whole fuss was about, why then were you quarreling with the lady?

Can't resist this swipe. You would have resolved your problem by now anyway.

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Guess tht maybe the bro is having some issues with you. Btw just leave it as marriage is about 2 person. And you are facing your bf most of the time and not her. Try to avoid for seeing her that often and this may helps you to reduce arguements with her. Btw, I don't have such a problem as I don't really give a darn about the parents and try not to comment too much on the family member. Everything will be fine!

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