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eliza

Married with foreigner

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If Malaysian people married with foreigner, what will happen then? Is that any benefit or disadvantage of marrying a foreigner? Pls help me to explain about it.

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I got headache now. My friend which originally from Arabic country proposed me to marry him. He just my fren, not my boyfren. If I marry him wat will happen next?

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i dont understand... he's just your firend? not boyfriend? and why do you even consider about it in the first place?

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erm.. dont mind me asking... but why r u marrying a friend instead of a boyfriend or fiance?

or u just entertaining the idea of marrying to a foreigner and to be in a foreign country?

Marrying to arabic countries have a few advantages and disadvantages

I will only list out the disadvantages, as the advantages u know oredi.

Disadvantages:

1. Your citizen status

Certain arab countries do not give you citizenship until ur married for at least 10 years, been a practising muslim according to their laws and etc. In the mean time, your considered stateless bcos they require u to give up your citizenship first.

Unless you go in with social visa or working visa, then you can still hold on to your citizenship.

2. Gender inequality

Females in arabic countries generally have lesser freedom than of western countries. You are expected to be obedient, to keep quiet, to obey and to dress in burqa at all times.

Some men there also like to abuse their spouses. And if you are ever such victim, the chances that you can seek a recourse or fairness is very limited.

3. Family

You will be at distance from your family.

4. Language

Unless you speak arabic, most like that you would have communication problem. Their english is ok at best, and its not that widely spoken.

Those are the general disadvantages i would foresee.

Edited by lordy

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Disadvantages:

1. Your citizen status

Certain arab countries do not give you citizenship until ur married for at least 10 years, been a practising muslim according to their laws and etc. In the mean time, your considered stateless bcos they require u to give up your citizenship first.

Unless you go in with social visa or working visa, then you can still hold on to your citizenship.

2. Gender inequality

Females in arabic countries generally have lesser freedom than of western countries. You are expected to be obedient, to keep quiet, to obey and to dress in burqa at all times.

Some men there also like to abuse their spouses. And if you are ever such victim, the chances that you can seek a recourse or fairness is very limited.

3. Family

You will be at distance from your family.

4. Language

Unless you speak arabic, most like that you would have communication problem. Their english is ok at best, and its not that widely spoken.

i agree with lordy's opinion..

marrying an arab has its own pros and cons...

yet he is not yr bf..why would you consider his marriage proposal in the first place, eliza??

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^^i agree also.

So why would u marry a friend? u obviously dont like him enough for him to be ur bf..

If u marry him, if ur chinese, then ur gonna have to change ur religion.. to muslim. And i rekon if u change to muslim, u wont like it that much.

being with an arab isnt as easy as being with a chinese, or malay. arabs tend to be overly protective, he has his say and u dont... u should know what i mean... they control alot.

i myself have been with an arab, and the 2nd day he wanted to take me home to meet his family. the 3rd day he was asking me to marry him... i got outta the relationship so quick, he probably thought i was wierd.. but he's the one thats wierd...

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Reasons that I consider his proposed :-

1) He is a nice man & nice fren

2) I dont have any bf & has no trust in love relationship (since my x-bf just left me when I was so sick)

3) His life style is not too arabian style, it's more to western style, but he never drink any alcoholic drinks

4) I think it's better to marry a fren than a boyfren.

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Reasons that I consider his proposed :-

1) He is a nice man & nice fren

2) I dont have any bf & has no trust in love relationship (since my x-bf just left me when I was so sick)

3) His life style is not too arabian style, it's more to western style, but he never drink any alcoholic drinks

4) I think it's better to marry a fren than a boyfren.

not being biased about foreigners regardless of religion or creed they are, but i can tell you that most foreigners that reside in malaysia temporarily will behave so well (goody goody, law abiding, etc) that you will be charmed by their sincereity and all those typical chivalrous b***s*** just cos they are in your country. once they gotcha and bring you back to their country then you will be finished. you will be trapped in their country and will experience tremendously difficult times just in case if you face difficulties in adjusting to their culture, custom and religion OR he just simply turned out to be a monster in disguise. And when that happens, there will be no turning back as the authorities does not recognise the rights of women (certain mid-east, african n 3rd world ctry) or you will have to face troublesome immigration procedures etc.

i bet u gotta think more than twice before deciding, especially he was just a friend!

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2) I dont have any bf & has no trust in love relationship (since my x-bf just left me when I was so sick)

U said u have no trust in love relationships... so why get married?

4) I think it's better to marry a fren than a boyfren.

Why? i dont understand?

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honestly... when in friendship ppl will have the tendency of holding back their real identity at home or their normal self. If he/she is your spouces then they will show more of themself. Not that i am against your idea of marrying a friend. Just that you'll have to be extra careful. I have heard lots of these arabic men things that is not so appealing as what lordy have mention.

Honestly maybe you should not give up on love. i am sure there will be someone around for you to love and earn their love back as well its just a matter of time and opportunity. Don't wait on faith. Why cuz faith everyday also got faith to meet ppl its the opportunity weather you want to sieze it or not.

So good luck in your love life and your decision.

Have a good day.

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not being biased about foreigners regardless of religion or creed they are, but i can tell you that most foreigners that reside in malaysia temporarily will behave so well (goody goody, law abiding, etc) that you will be charmed by their sincereity and all those typical chivalrous b***s*** just cos they are in your country. once they gotcha and bring you back to their country then you will be finished. you will be trapped in their country and will experience tremendously difficult times just in case if you face difficulties in adjusting to their culture, custom and religion OR he just simply turned out to be a monster in disguise. And when that happens, there will be no turning back as the authorities does not recognise the rights of women (certain mid-east, african n 3rd world ctry) or you will have to face troublesome immigration procedures etc.

ya... i agree with astrosurge..

i read many memoirs about these arab womens, how they suffered badly in the hands of their husbands and the thing is the laws of these countries do not protect women as they treat women as 2nd class citizens, which can be discarded if they want to and marry other wives and have numerous mistresses to satisfy their sexual appetites..

just be careful ...

Edited by musiclover85

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Reasons that I consider his proposed :-

1) He is a nice man & nice fren

2) I dont have any bf & has no trust in love relationship (since my x-bf just left me when I was so sick)

3) His life style is not too arabian style, it's more to western style, but he never drink any alcoholic drinks

4) I think it's better to marry a fren than a boyfren.

Well Eliza,

I am not sure you are making the right decision here. If he is only a friend, have true love or love relationship develop between you guys or you are just being sick of being lonelly and without a companion. For girls, happiness in marriage is everything to them. I would suggest you give it a deep thought before committing yourself.

Cheers mate!

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u know,.. there are 3 kinds of ppl who get married...

1. Those who married bcos of love

2. Those who married bcos they just want to get married, and love isnt neccesary there. Marry to have children and family

3. Those who married bcos they dont know what they should really do

I mean, do you really want to get married to a man u dont love and be with someone u dont love for the rest of your life? What if after 2 years, you suddenly found true love, but with another guy?

A person should only marry if they are in love. Any other reasons will make that a very painful relationship. Plus whats the point of marriage if its loveless?

Do you think you can find enough love for him? Do you feel you can tell the difference betweent true love and "make believe" love?

If you are not sure, better not proceed. Proceed only when you are sure, firm and have no regrets.

Unless of course, you want to live a life of regrets and "what if".

:lol:

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Reasons that I consider his proposed :-

1) He is a nice man & nice fren

2) I dont have any bf & has no trust in love relationship (since my x-bf just left me when I was so sick)

3) His life style is not too arabian style, it's more to western style, but he never drink any alcoholic drinks

4) I think it's better to marry a fren than a boyfren.

No matter what the opinions here are, you should know best what to do for yourself. Follow your gut feel and if in doubt, don't do it. But if you are certain and willing to take the risks, then it is your choice in the end. You make your bed, you lie in it.

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good news!!!

my arabic fren & I just remain as bestfren...

so this story already end & we're not gonna get marry.

he's my very good fren... hopefully he can meet some other girl who will loves him more...

I couldn't love him, becoz he just my bestfren, forever...

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man this was the most bizarre thread ever! hahahaha

however, I am marrying a foreigner but I don't reside in Malaysia and neither does he.

Nothing will happen if you marry a foreigner it isn't a new thing!

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errr... u better checkout that Arab guy custom tradition... as far as I know... Arab people treats women as lower class human (but depends on the self practiced custom)... most Arab men, tend to 'lock'/'ground' their wife inside house.

this is one stupid tradition i can never agree of.

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hahaha... this thread just kept silent for most of time...

Well, ImL3s, my age is 26 this year... still dun have special boyfren till now... becoz still despair bout having any relationship... yeah, Im alone... but works & duties are making me much more busy & Im happy with my freelancing modelling jobs... but not happy with my current job in office which everyday gain more burden & Im almost not capable to do it sometimes... I wanna shared something bout relationship... but sometimes I scared to share... I met someone who I think the best & very special... since few months ago in March... but the relationship is still a question mark for me... yeah off course the guy is not originally Malaysian... but from other country... hmmm... not sure what will happen in future... but the truth is Im still despair bout relationship...

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Sometimes, in order to find love, we have to the risk. I guess there's not much diff between foreigners and locals. Only certain things, traditions, languages, customs, and some other stuffs. Yet, everything still depends on the individual itself. About what others have mentioned, culture, and way of treating, anyway, we always have laws. And best of all, what ever we do, there's always options these days. Anyhow, when u meet the right person, i guess there'll be no doubt by then, be it foreigners or locals.

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freelancing model, then you'll be pretty enough to get another foreiger "bestfriend" but this time get a white ppl :P

Edited by Aster

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hahaha... off course lah... but you know, beautifull is not everything... I mean Im never found any true love till now... all cheated & more compromise... most guy that I met, they not like me becoz they're truly love me... they just like me becoz of the beauty, becoz they wanna control me & just wanna hang around with me, & becoz they felt too proud when Im hanging with them ... they just need me when they really need me, but when I need them, they became like b**ls**t man for me... no matter what race they are... Im totally give up with this kind of love but cheat affair... everyones want to be in love... wanna have true love... but Im not affordable to achieve that till now...

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